Music has a profound effect on me. It dictates my mood, helps me process emotions or keeps me focused. It motivates me when I’m running & helps me when I’m down. And of course, I’m listening to some great music while writing this post.
I felt like writing, mostly because I was feeling a bit like shit. It calms me down, helps me put things in order. The idea to write about music just popped into my head, but I’ve had it in the back of mind for a while now.
Music really is something special. It can evoke such a wide range of emotions, from blissful joy to a depressed pitfall & everything in between. Whenever I’m feeling down I just crack up some tunes. Not necessarily happy tunes mind you, sometimes it’s better to soak in the sadness for a bit, there’s no point in keeping it inside.
According to most people’s standards, I listen to music a lot. I put in my earbuds when I leave for classes at 8AM, or put on my headphones when I’m working behind my desk. Every time I ride my bike, walk or run, I’m listening to music. Whenever I’m studying or programming, I’m listening to music. In total, I probably listen to music for at least 6 hours a day. Luckily that is more than enough to justify buying a Tidal subscription for 10 euros a month ;p
That does bring me to my next point; I’m an audiophile. I love high resolution audio & my audio setup reflects that. My Sennheiser HD 660S are very dear to me, and they’ve provided me with hundreds of hours of listening pleasure at this point.
I’m not really picky with what genres of music I listen to either. The music just has to provide a certain feeling that fits my current mood. I do prefer listening to entire albums, which is why I’ve amassed a great list of albums that I love to listen to. Despite my horrible memory I tend to navigate this list just fine, with each song just coming up as a feeling in the moment & my mind magically navigating to the right album.
My love for music has been around for as long as I can remember. Back in high school I was constantly listening to music; I’ve even played the piano for years before stopping due to a lack of interest. Sadly that spirals back to my lack of motivation for most things, but I digress.
The truth is, I wanted to write, just write, to process the exam stress that I’m going through right now. I’ve got exams in two weeks & as usual, the stress has been killing me. My horrible sleep hygiene doesn’t help either. I rarely go to bed before midnight & when I do, I just lie awake in bed, thinking. Thinking of how I’ll have to study more tomorrow, because otherwise I won’t make it. A constant fear of failure looms above me, ready to eat me up inside.
Well, this post got depressing quite fast, I’m sorry about that. Thing is, I want to use this site to express myself, so when I’m feeling stressed, I want to express that as well. It’s liberating in a way, sharing this information with “the world”, in my own controlled way.
If you’ve gotten this far, thank for you reading through my ramblings & insecurities, I do truly appreciate it. Au revoir.